Religious Quest

There is a lot going on in life right now... My pregnancy will be done in about 6 weeks, my oldest child will be starting pre-school soon, and I'm beginning potty-training my almost-2-year-old. I haven't had much time to sit and really think about what I believe in.

Since taking a break back in March, I've realized that no matter what way I may go, I will always have Pagan tendencies. I have just seen, felt, and experience too much on that side that I have enjoyed very much and am not willing to pretend it didn't happen. It's something that I could never let go.

I've been going to Jehovah's Witness meetings every Sunday and doing a Bible study with them every Tuesday morning. I enjoy it, mainly because I love to learn and understand how people worship Deity. But even though I enjoy spending time with them, and actually agree more with their interpretation of the Bible more than any other Christian sect, it's still something that I don't see myself dedicating myself to. It's such a strict belief system. Granted, they are happy and secure in their beliefs, but it just seems so narrow in areas and I just can't make myself wrap around that.

Right now, spiritually, I'm not forcing anything and just going with the flow. I love the people at Kingdom Hall and have become friends with a few. My daughters love being there and being with them, so I know they have good souls and are wonderful people. I just think I'm going to work it my way somehow.

Taking a Break

Right now I have a lot going on in my life. I'm pregnant, I have two toddlers, and suffer from depression. Even though I've been taking the proper medication and have stayed focus and everything, right now I feel so overwhelmed and lost. I'm questioning and resenting so much.

I've decided to take a step back from everything, including religion, and reassessing little by little. Sometimes that is just something that has to be done.

Week Eleven

24 Oct 08 - 31 Oct 08
Days 81 through 88

Blessed Samhain! I am in a lot of physical pain right now. I made a witch costume (took 3 days!) that I was determined to wear to work today. After being on my feet for 7 hours I came home to end up trick-or-treating with my babies. I'm on the verge of tears from the pain in my feet.

My youngest had her first birthday on the 26th.

I've been taking it easy. Just waiting for the next quarter at the Pagan Campus. It starts in a couple of days -- and also in a few days are my exams for WIcca Revealed and Beginning Tarot.